Friday, 14 October 2016

Unmistakably Bills (Caledonian)

Unmistakably Bills (Caledonian)
Name: Unmistakably Bill's
Label: "500ml of illustriously descriptive pale ale for post-match commentary"
Brewery: Caledonian Brewery
ABV: 4.6%

Tasting notes: "To honour the spirit of rugby legend Bill McLaren, we have prepared this profound pale ale. Brewed with a cunning balance of memorable malt and appealing hop, a beer bursting with character - just like the big man himself. So raise your glass and a cheer. Here's to Bill."

Game: It's the crazy winter game season again! Fixture pileup! Today is Mafia 3. So far, so amazing! Great story. The only problem is there's a lot of the "N" word here. Yep, that's right, NIPPLES. So many nipples on the playboy magazines and Vargas paintings that are lying around.
Initial rating: 8 nipples out of 10.  

Friday, 30 September 2016

Golden Ale (John Smiths)

Golden Ale (John Smiths)
Name: Golden Ale
Label: "Tadcaster Brewery"
Brewery: John Smiths (Heineken)
ABV: 4.0%

Tasting notes: "A refreshing and lightly hopped Golden Ale."

Game: Tempted for Forza Horizon 3. The reviews are saying it's the best racing game ever and giving it between 9 and 10 out of 10. Well *I'LL* be the judge of that thank you very much, by playing the demo for two minutes. *plays demo for two minutes* - wow it's ace! But is it worth getting when I've just been given Forza Horizon 2 for free on Games with Gold...?
Demo rating: 8 petrols out of 10

Saturday, 24 September 2016

Cwrw Haf (Hurns Brewing)

Cwrw Haf (Hurns Brewing)
Name: Cwrw Haf
Label: "Tomos Watkin's - The Great Ales of Wales - A taste of summer from the land of song"
Brewery: Hurns Brewing Co
ABV: 4.2%

Tasting notes: "The taste of Welsh Summer captured in a bottle. Cwrw Haf is a refreshing golden summer ale brewed using only the finest floor malted barley and wheat. Infused with the invigorating citrus flavours of golding and cascade whole hops and finished off with the summer floral aroma of the famous fuggle hop. Enjoy Welsh Summertime, anywhere, any place, rain or shine!"

Game: A few initial thoughts about Star Wars Battlefront DLC: Death Star. Yay Chewbacca, boooo Bossk, but yay at Bossk's regenerating health! Wow look at the graphics on that, flying around a Star Destroyer with the Death Star in the background, now we're IN the Death Star, now we're back in space doing the TRENCH RUN OH MY GOD THIS IS THE BEST STAR WARS GAME EVER.
Rating: 9 stay on targets out of 10

Golden Bitter Ale (Gwaun Valley)

Golden Bitter Ale (Gwaun Valley)
Name: Golden Bitter Ale
Label: "Cwrw Cwm Gwaun"
Brewery: Gwaun Valley
ABV: 4.0%

Tasting notes: "This is a rich, smooth bitter ale with a strong, hoppy flavour made with malted barley, wheat and natural spring water."

Game: The last Uncharted game? On to Uncharted 4: A Thief's End. Climbing, shooting, get into cover, headshot, climbing, environment-based puzzle, shooting, climbing, puzzle win. Amazing graphics!
Rating: 9 headshots out of 10

Blodwen (Cwrw Cwm Gwaun)

Blodwen (Cwrw Cwm Gwaun)
Name: Blodwen
Label: "The Gwaun Valley is well known for its home brew making traditions - Brewed in Pembrokeshire"
Brewery: Cwrw Cwm Gwaun
ABV: 4.3%

Tasting notes: "A creamy full bodied bitter, ruby red in colour with a hint of caramel and made using pure spring water."

Game: Almost to the end of the PS4 remasters - Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception. Climbing, shooting, get into cover, headshot, climbing, environment-based puzzle, shooting, climbing, puzzle win. Great graphics.
Rating: 8 X marks the spots out of 10

Saturday, 17 September 2016

Wet Your Whistle (Box Steam)

Wet Your Whistle (Box Stream)
Name: Wet Your Whistle
Label: "Beautifully engineered in Wiltshire - A zesty golden ale"
Brewery: Box Steam
ABV: 4.5%

Tasting notes: "Wet Your Whistle is a full-bodied golden ale with a refreshingly clean, bittersweet taste and an aroma of fruit and hops"

Game: So the Resident Evil 7 teaser / demo is pretty terrifying. I almost pooed myself on about three separate occasions even though it only lasts about 20 minutes. Not sure why it's called "Beginning Hour" given said time it took to get to the 'end'. Thankfully it wasn't an hour long otherwise I'd have needed several changes of underwear and a pacemaker fitted.
Rating: 8 bowel movements out of 10

Wednesday, 7 September 2016

Bootlegger Apple Brew (Dockyard Distillers)

Bootlegger Apple Brew (Dockyard Distillers)
Name: Bootlegger
Label: "A genuine old fashioned apple brew with white grain spirit flavour"
Brewery: Dockyard Distillers
ABV: 5.5%

Tasting notes: "In the years of prohibition America, moonshiners used fruit juice to sweeten their raw illicit booze before transporting it in used barrels. Inspired by these lawless rebels, Bootlegger apple brew has a distinct taste with white grain spirit flavour." I had a horrible feeling this was going to taste like cider. Pleasingly it taste like appley beer!

Game: Back to mop up unfinished side-missions and collectings in Witcher 3.  Geralt was becoming over-encumbered too easily so time to check the old  inventory. You know when you've been collecting too much stuff when you've got 10 copper mugs, 15 corks, 33 flasks, 23 vials, 8 silver pantaloons, 16 smoking pipes, 9 blunt axes, 22 skulls, 18 piles of ash, 19 silver teapots, 42 animal hides of various descriptions, 3 rotting fleshes and a broken oar!  That's not half of the stuff!

Saturday, 3 September 2016

Night Boat (Madness)

Night Boat (Madness)Name: Night Boat
Label: "London Porter - Last Beer Along the River Nile - Beers with a touch of Madness"
Brewery: Madness Brewing Co (Portobello)
ABV: 4.6%

Tasting notes: "A delightfully rich velvet London Porter, has been brewed by our friends at Portobello Brewery. Packed to the rafters with cappuccino, chocolate, hazelnut and dark fruit aromas, it's a beer with a taste for adventure. So when it's just gone noon, half past monsoon, open a chilled Night Boat, pour slowly into a glass and savour one of Capital City's finest offerings. Cheers!"

Game: Final review of Heavy Rain on PS4. Yeah. Umm. It was... good. Horrible start but it definitely improved. Weird vibe about it, not super-dissimilar from Deadly Premonition. Some absolutely abysmal voice acting adds to the weirdness and charm. I only saw one ending. It didn't end well. I assume I fuzzed up big time.
Rating: 6 weirds out of 10 

Sunday, 28 August 2016

Spiced Rum Finish Oak Aged Beer (Innis & Gunn)

Spiced Rum Finish Oak Aged Beer (Innis and Gunn)
Name: Spiced Rum Finish Oak Aged Beer
Label: "This special Innis & Gunn beer has been finished over oak infused with Caribbean Spiced Rum"
Brewery: Innis & Gunn
ABV: 7.4%

Tasting notes: "Since discovering the perfect marriage of beer, oak and rum back in 2006 we have been busy brewing, maturing and tasting, trying to uncover new ways to craft these unusual bedfellows into even more delicious beer. And in doing so we experienced a eureka moment of flavour, discovering a mouth-watering union of specially brewed, toffee-hued Innis & Gunn beer and very rare Caribbean Spiced Rum that is absolutely bursting with flavour."

Game: ​ More PS4 remastering: Heavy Rain. Initial impressions be like, what the hell is this? I got up, had a shower, got dressed, went downstairs, drank some orange, did. some. work., helped wife put the shopping away, set the table, played with the kids. Well done, you've made a game duller than my ACTUAL life.

Rating: 1 boring life out of 10.

Wednesday, 17 August 2016

Double Hop Monster IPA (Greene King)

Double Hop Monster IPA (Greene King)
Name: Double Hop Monster IPA
Label: "Late hopped for maximum aroma & a refreshingly bitter finish"
Brewery: Greene King
ABV: 7.2%

Tasting notes: "Double Hop Monster IPA is the wildest, hoppiest beer we've ever brewed. A "big" beer in every way, it's bold, bitter and thanks to extensive dry-hopping - fabulously aromatic."

Game: Part 2 of Uncharted: The Nathan Drake Collection is surprisingly called Uncharted 2: Among Thieves. ​ Went through this one really quickly and to be honest I can't remember much about it. It definitely had climbing, shooting and simple environment-based puzzle solving. It was definitely good too. Sometimes games just go in one eye and out the other though...

Rating: 7 vague memories out of 10.