Tuesday, 28 June 2016
Label: "Golden Ale - Scottish Optic malted barley brew, infused with Blended Malt Scotch Whisky"
Brewery: Greene King
Tasting notes: "Golden ale with oak matured Scotch whisky. Brewed with a single variety of malted barley, "Optic" and blended malt Scotch whisky infused from toasted oak. Rich and full with dried fruit & vanilla accents."
Game: Another quick one about Star Wars Battlefront DLC: Bespin. It looks the part, it sounds the part. It's got new heroes, Lando Calrissian (no-good scoundrel, you'd like him) and Gendar (you never heard him in the films but the voice and accent is so good it fits like a glove/head bandage). New weapons, Jabba contracts and new maps abound; Cloud City, woah there's Slave I, there's that room where they all met, there're some bombs to disarm / arm in new mode Sabotage, AT-AT's here? Awesome! 8 scoundrels out of 10.
Monday, 27 June 2016
Label: "Inspired by tales of sunbeams striking the brewhouse of Britain's oldest brewer. Legend has it our brewers were first moved to create Brilliant Ale by the vision of the bright, early morning sun sending golden shafts of light onto our solid oak mash tun."
Brewery: Shepherd Neame
Tasting notes: "Historically this recipe was formulated with 100% pale malt, bittered by our signature East Kent Goldings hops. A golden, brilliantly bright, hoppy ale was born. Today this ale has been rejuvenated by using the modern hop variety of Cascade. Hugely popular in its day, this revitalised ale has risen from the annals of history for the modern drinker to savour."
Game: Quick one about Star Wars Battlefront DLC: "Outer Rim". It's got new heroes Greedo (he shot first) and Nien Numb (he laughed first), new mode Extraction where you've got to transport some stuff to some place and the other team have to stop you transporting the stuff to the place. It's got ace maps, Jabba's throne room, woah dead Rancor! Jabba contracts, new weapons etc etc. Rating: 7 Banthas out of 10.
Sunday, 26 June 2016
Label: "Huge hoppy character, brewed with 7 hop varieties and dry hopped for extra intensity."
Brewery: Metropolitan Brewing Co (Greene King)
Tasting notes: "India Pale Ale. Humulus Iupulous or 'wolf of the woods' the Latin name for hops. Centennial, Amarillo, Styrian Goldings & Cascade varieties deliver big, bold tropical fruit aromas, with delicate, herbal bitterness to finish."
Game: Britain has voted to leave the EU! Gaming Ales doesn't think it's that big a deal. It would have been nice to remain in the EU, it makes sense to keep Europe united rather than split up, but it's not the end of the world. There will still be games and there will still be beer. Plus the new Zelda game will be released on WiiU AND NX in 2017! Brexit rating: 5/10
Saturday, 11 June 2016
Label: "Hoppy and Golden - Enlighten Yourself - A drier, golden brew with cascade, centennial and local Surrey fuggles hops"
Brewery: Hogs Back
Tasting notes: "We've designed Surrey Nirvana to release the bad karma and achieve that perfect state of mind. Brewed with Centennial, Cascade and Fuggles hops to give strong citrus and floral notes on the nose. It is light in body and well-balanced, with delightful mellow citrus flavours. This beer showcases the wonderful aromatic character that can be achieved by late hopping."
Game: Great news! XCOM 2 is getting an Xbox One release! After the utter dismayment of it only releasing on PC originally, this is mega news. Roll on 6th September 2016. I definitely know what to ask Father Birthday for now! News rating: 9 aliens out of 10.
Saturday, 4 June 2016
Label: "Hopped with Tasmanian Galaxy, a variety with intensely fruity aromas"
Brewery: Metropolitan Brewing Co (Greene King)
Tasting notes: "Pale ale. Galaxy hop from down under, imparts powerful fruit character. A smooth pale ale with distinctive tropical fruit aromas; passion fruit, lychee, mango and blackcurrants."
Game: Ever fancied being a goat? No, me neither, but now we can thanks to this months free 'Games with Gold' offering of Goat Simulator. And for a self-proclaimed 'simulator' it's not very good. The goat slides around all over the place, you can jump out of your pen straight away, the goat's tongue is lolling out of it's mouth constantly. I've stroked loads of goats and their tongue never does that unless you bought one of those paper bags full of goat feed from the bloke in the shed. Also, there are no people with paper bags of goat feed. Totally unrealistic. 2 baaas out of 10.
Monday, 30 May 2016
Label: "I love the smell of hops in the morning"
Tasting notes: "ATTEN HUT!! Your Mission: You require delicious hoppy goodness with a satisfying bitter finish. The Target: Your taste buds. Inventory Required: 1 Glass (preferably pint), 1 Bottle Opener, 1 Chilled Bottle of A-Hop-Alypse Now (loaded with Chinook, Cascade & Fuggles hops). Complete your mission for full flavour satisfaction. Good luck soldier!" Great name, great taste!
Game: After the abomination of the Doom multiplayer beta, it's time to try the single player campaign instead. Well blimey, it's great! No sprint button, no reloading, no health regeneration, just straight forward legging it around really fast killing demons constantly. Oh and Mars and Hell never looked so good. Double Oh and, the doors sound the same as on the original Doom! Rating: 9 Hells out of 10
Wednesday, 25 May 2016
Label: "Manchester Pale Ale - Refreshing golden ale"
Brewery: JW Lees
Tasting notes: "MPA is a golden ale made from all British malt, Liberty and Mount Hood hops. It's brewed especially for bottle to capture the full, hoppy character of our cask beer - it's the perfect alternative to draught MPA."
Game: Only a few days until the final Witcher 3 DLC lands. Blood and Wine. I was hoping for Blood and Ale, or even just Lager, but I'll settle for Blood and Wine I guess. I love the Witcher series and want more more more but Marcin Iwinski (job title: Big Wig in Witcher-land) said in an interview, "I can assure you we are not working on another Witcher". You can't assure negative things you foolish genius Witcher game inventorer! It's against the laws of physics or something. So this means they must actually be making a Witcher 4! Phew, glad that's sorted. I'm going to call my mate Marcin now for a release date. Speak soon. x
Friday, 29 April 2016
Label: "Spiced Dark Beer - Brewed with strong notes of mulled winter spices"
Brewery: Hogs Back Brewery
Tasting notes: "The Winter Warmer is a spicy and dark number made from four extra special malts, each of which impart a unique flavour on this complex, well-rounded and full bodied dark ale. A very special mulling syrup is added to this rich initial flavour leaving the tastes of the season dancing merrily on your tongue!" It's nearly May but the weather is like winter!
Game: Available now via EA Access, FIFA 16! Having read none of the marketing or promotional stuff, I can't yet tell what's different between 16 and 15, other than the number has gone up by... hang on... *counts fingers*... one. The graphics do look slightly better actually. It's about football. It's great. It's still better than PES. Rating: 8/10
Saturday, 16 April 2016
Label: "New beer in the sett"
Tasting notes: "Other ducks stick to rivers and ponds, this mischievous mallard bravely ventures to the brewery gates to pinch prized hops blown wayward from the stores. His boldness inspires this amber beer, brewed with Slovenian Celeia hops. Enjoy with chicken pie and creamy pasta dishes."
Game: New game time! And Quantum Break is about time! Great timing, Battlefront is starting to get on my tits! Quantum Break is utterly brilliant. It's super-slick with TV show quality production values. And there also a TV show with TV show quality production values in between each chapter to flesh out the story. It's about a bloke who is suddenly really ace with guns but can manipulate time as well. And in the story you go back in time and it turns out you're actually your own mum. It's crazy-good. Rating: 9 out of time.
Saturday, 2 April 2016
Label: "New beer in the Sett"
Tasting notes: "In the lagoon of Brownsea Island, you can find the Wild Wader striding proudly in the morning haze. This amber brew combines an aromatic collection of British, Slovenian and New World hops for a refreshing easy-drinking beer. Great with fish & chips."
Game: Right, first off, I totally loved Wolfenstein: The New Order and The Old Blood. Bethesda did great, which makes the Doom Beta all the more surprising. It's terrible. Your avatar feels like you're floating around the map rather than running, it looks and plays like a last-gen title and everything seems twice as fast as it should be. At one point I was circling around a bit of scenery shooting at an enemy and it felt like a sped up Benny Hill nightmare in hell, thankfully without the sexism. Weapons have no visual punch and enemies just pop in a shower of disappearing blood and gaudy looking pickups. If the single-player campaign has the same feel to it then we're Doomed. And not in a good way. Back to Star Wars Battlefront we go... 2/10.