Saturday, 26 November 2011

Old Speckled Hen (Morland) - in an Old Speckled Hen Pint Glass

Old Speckled Hen (Morland) - in an Old Speckled Hen Pint Glass
Name: Old Speckled Hen
Label: "Strong fine ale - A distinctive rich malty taste bursting with character, fruity aroma and deliciously smooth"
Brewery: Morland
ABV: 5.2%

Rating: Continuing my current penchant for drinking ale out of branded glass receptacles, here's Old Speckled Hen in an Old Speckled Hen pint glass. Double quality.

Game: True Skyrim story: so I arrived at the College of Winterhold, cold, hungry and fantastically tired. I'd been walking for what felt like days, since the tragic incident where my horse decided to gallop itself off a cliff. Stupid horse, that was a 1000 septims badly spent. Anyway I chatted to a bunch of people in the college and I was a bit like "Yeah, whatever, I just need to get some kip, which way is bed?" but they insisted on trying to teach me magic. Right, forget your Lesser Ward spell, I'm off down the Frozen Hearth for a pint.

Stepping outside of the college I'm greeted by one annoyed looking dragon spewing flame in my general direction. Now armed with just my Lesser Ward spell, a steel sword and a carrot, I attempted to battle the beast as its sole purpose was blatantly to hinder my evening visit to the local ale house. As the conflict progressed I became ever more weary, and slightly toasted. But suddenly the dragon's health rapidly started to ebb. I knew it wasn't the effects of the carrot and so I turned my charred body away and noticed all the residents of the college had come out to battle the dragon with me. Standing shoulder to shoulder with my new found comrades-in-robes, the dragon was quickly vanquished and from this day forth I pledged my allegiance to the College and all who live there.

Wednesday, 23 November 2011

March of the Penguins (Williams Bros)

March of the Penguins (Williams Bros)
Name: March of the Penguins
Label: "Smooth creamy stout - Microbrewed for maximum flavour! - Brewed in Alloa"
Brewery: Williams Bros Brewing Co
ABV: 4.9%

Rating: "A silky smooth stout brewed with a blend of chocolate malt and roasted barley combined with lovely hop aromas and a spicy, fruity finish." Drink this whilst fighting the Penguin in Arkham City. Gotta be done.

Game: Perrenial nipple-head MP Keith Vaz is at it again spouting his hateful bullshit in the direction of video games. This time he's linking Modern Warfare 3 to the July 7 London bombings. A pretty disgusting thing to say really just to gain some cheap publicity. One chap on Facebook added a great comment something along the lines of, "AGAINST pretend war, FOR real war. Interesting moral position."

I'd like to lob a little hate-filled hand grenade in Vaz's general direction, but I'm not a violent person. Even though I've been playing violent games for the past twenty five years!

Friday, 18 November 2011

Norfolk Bitter (Woodforde's)

Norfolk Bitter (Woodforde's)
Name: Norfolk Bitter
Label: "Brewed at Woodforde's Broadland Brewery, Woodbastwick, Norfolk - Smooth with a subtle hint of citrus fruits"
Brewery: Woodforde's
ABV: 4.5%

Rating: "A perfect match for... Caramelised crispy pork belly and roast meats."  That's proper food and ale right there.

Game: Got so many massive games on the go at the moment, Skyrim, MW3, Assassins Creed Revelations, Batman etc. I spend about half an hour each gaming session arguing with myself about which game to put on. Yeah I hate being bi-polar, it's awesome. Opted for Modern Warfare 3 tonight. It's very violent. In fact, it's quite horrible if you consider the level of realism. It just reminds you how shit war really is. War should be banned. From now on countries should settle all their arguments and power struggles on Team Deathmatch instead. No more senseless waste of life. Result.

Friday, 11 November 2011

Champion Double Ale (Broughton)

Champion Double Ale (Broughton)
Name: Champion Double Ale
Label: "Brewed in the Scottish borders"
Brewery: Broughton Ales
ABV: 5.5%

Rating: "The two beers are brewed and fermented separately in their own unique ways then blended together in a warm conditioning vessel to allow the two ales to mature. The result is a delicious beer, very drinkable with complex flavours and aromas." I agree, it is very drinkable.

Game: Hey ladies (and gents), do you want to see my massive ventral striatum? According to a recent BBC article, Computer gamers' brains 'differ' from all you normal folk, apparently. Now, being hopelessly addicted to video games means it's more than likely that I have an abnormally large ventral striatum, some bit of brain that acts as a "reward hub". The article doesn't say that this is necessarily a bad thing though, so having a generally positive outlook on life I'm going to assume it's a good thing. I'm now playing even more in order to get into the Guinness Book of Records with the worlds biggest ventral striatum, hopefully drinking beer also helps. Next stop, gigantic nucleus accumbens!

EPA (Marston's)

EPA (Marston's)
Name: EPA
Label: "English Pale Ale - Craft brewed"
Brewery: Marston's
ABV: 3.6%

Rating: "EPA is a refreshing lighter blonde ale with subtle citrus flavours and a delicate bitter aftertaste." B & M Bargains are doing some great ales at the moment, reasonably priced too.

Game: Well played to Amazon, they delivered Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 and Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim bang on time. Both games are absolutely brilliant, obviously.  And with Assassins Creed: Revelations arriving next week, I'll have lots of amazing games all with a colon in the title. Colon fans rejoice!

Monday, 7 November 2011

Frank's Ginger Beer (Kopparberg)

Frank's Ginger Beer (Kopparberg)
Name: Frank's Ginger Beer
Label: "Best served chilled over ice - Genuine Swedish Ginger Beer - Alcoholic"
Brewery: Kopparberg
ABV: 4.0%

Rating: "Frank's ginger beer is a traditional beer blended with ginger. Contains barley malt."  I used to despise ginger beer. After drinking the alcoholic version though, I must admit it's definitely an acquired taste, which I seem to be acquiring fairly rapidly. Who the heck is Frank though?

Game: Facebook and Twitter competitions are awesome aren't they. Usually I win absolutely nothing though.  However last week I won £50 worth of Amazon vouchers courtesy of and their newly launched Playr2 Facebook page.  Then I won a Call of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 t-shirt courtesy of the fine folk at Game's Twitter account @GameDigital!  A colleague said I should buy a lottery ticket considering this good run of fortune. I enquired whether he was mad and that I may as well just throw a quid down the drain - there's a fourteen million to one chance of winning the lottery you know!  No-one really wins any money anyway. The "winners" are just taken away to a secret island where they're eaten by rich, fat people with a penchant for human flesh.

Sunday, 6 November 2011

Blond Witch (Moorhouse's)

Blond Witch (Moorhouse's)
Name: Blond Witch
Label: "A premium, light, refreshing ale with a sweet citrus dry finish"
Brewery: Moorhouse's
ABV: 4.5%

Rating: Named after an ex-girlfriend, this is just as feisty and tangy.

Game: Just a quick one about FIFA 12.  The difficulty settings are broken or have gone AWOL.  I know this because me and one other person on Twitter have noticed the issue. Professional difficulty is too hard (help, I can't score or defend).  Semi-Pro difficulty is really easy (woo, winning by at least a three goal margin and opponent can't score for toffee).  I don't know whether this is a good thing or not. I'm just currently enjoying that winning feeling in every match, until the novelty wears off.

Wednesday, 2 November 2011

Pendle Witches Brew (Moorhouse's)

Pendle Witches Brew (Moorhouse's)
Name: Pendle Witches Brew
Label: "A light golden beer, soft, crisp and bitter-sweet flavours"
Brewery: Moorhouse's
ABV: 5.1%

Rating: Great beer, I've only drank it once before and that was at a beer festival about fifteen years ago. At least I think it was this beer, the memories are fuzzy, bordering on non-existent...

Game: In the last post I mentioned my Halloween date with Calendar Man in Batman: Arkham City. Well what an anti-climax that was! I didn't even get an invite into his cell. No meal, no coffee, no film. See you at Thanksgiving! When the heck is Thanksgiving anyway? And how come those lucky Americans get Thanksgiving and Christmas, whilst we only get Christmas?